Women Love Me, Martha Stewart Fears Me.

I am home alone this weekend, discovering just how much of a nerd I am. I pretty much went to just about every bookstore I could find, spent a grand total of $6.80 on books and $42,000,000 on gas, and then called it a day. Whoo, I’m beat. I’ve decided that I am the best [...]

Read Full Post »

Journalistic Integrity Gone Horribly Wrong.

I heard the most profound statement on the news the other day. I have got to share it with you. Are you ready? Brace yourselves now, but here it is: Gas prices have gone up! It’s true, I heard it on the radio. I was amazed at the way they presented that story (I think [...]

Read Full Post »

Popularity Contest

Warning: Extremely Vehement Ranting ahead.
I can’t remember ever wanting to do something because it was popular. There were a few things I did as a kid, however. Like eating those fireball candies. I hated them, but for some reason I kept eating them. Then, in 5th or 6th grade, this little voice in my [...]

Read Full Post »

Harry Potter and the Fan who needs to get a life.

There is currently a trial going on between JK Rowling, the author of the Harry Potter books, and a guy named Steven Vander Ark, a 50 year old librarian who really needs to get a life. He wants to publish a Harry Potter Lexicon, which is basically a book explaining all the different terms, people, [...]

Read Full Post »

Bathroom Etiquette

I believe it is time to revisit the unspoken rules of bathroom etiquette. In fact, I would offer a suggestion for an additional rule or two. We all should know by now that, at least for guys, there are some unspoken rules for appropriate behavior in the bathrooms. Such as do not make eye contact, [...]

Read Full Post »

I think I might be a Vampire…

Today I am actually working in the day time. This is, of course, very exciting news for everyone. The day is cool, but it is clear and bright and sunny out. You would think this would excite me. It does not. Why? I’m glad you asked. I realized today that it could be because I’m [...]

Read Full Post »

More fun with Plasma

There are some interesting people who work at Biolife, the place where I go to give plasma. There is one nurse in particular who is my absolute favorite. I won’t say what her name is, mostly because one day she wants to be a lawyer, and I don’t want her to sue me for using [...]

Read Full Post »

I’m ‘roiding up for Plasma donations.

I was at Biolife on last Wednesday donating plasma, and the nurse asked me if I wanted to participate in the Tetanus booster program. She explained it to me that my blood did not have any tetanus antibodies in it (probably because I had my last tetanus shot something like 15 years ago.) She said [...]

Read Full Post »

Warning: Vogon Poetry Ahead!

Surgeons General Warning: the following blog entry contains lethal amounts of Vogon poetry. PROCEED WITH CAUTION. Lethal amounts of Vogon poetry have been known to cause death in laboratory mice.
Reader Discretion is advised.
I just heard that this is National Poetry month. And since today is also April Fool’s Day, then, this is blog is appropriate.
You [...]

Read Full Post »